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Musical Offenses

Fines for Bass Infractions

General Infractions

Amount

Playing loudly during warm up

$10

Sound -checking amp with funk slapping

$25

Loud cursing after mistake

$20

Asking for "E" tuning note

$25

Playing "E" while horns tune to Bb,

$50

Playing written-out walking line

$75

Writing note names over leger-line notes

$50

Writing beat numbers under dotted figures

$50

Playing eighth notes

$5 each

Playing sixteenth notes

$10 each

Playing above 1st octave

immediate dismissal

Dragging fast tempo

$75

Dragging ballad tempo

$100

Blacking out during ballad

$200

Ignoring drummer's tempo

$100

Following drummer's tempo

$250

Asking to borrow Real Book for "All Of Me"

$1,000

UPRIGHT PLAYERS

Showing up before the first downbeat

$25

Playing audibly

$25

Faking changes

$25

Slapping

$150

Missing tutti lick, then mentioning vintage of bass

$25

Excessive sweating

$25

Pedal point double-stops during horn solo

$50

Asking leader for a solo

$30

Accepting solo when offered

$50

Taking second chorus

$100

Playing solo arco

$400

Pretending to check tuning after playing out of tune

$100

Playing "A Train" ending on every tune

$200

Playing extended "A Train" ending on every tune

$500

 


ELECTRIC PLAYERS

Checking hair between tunes

$15

Experimenting with odd meters

$25

Missing root after blistering fill

$150

Playing with a pick

$50

Tuning during ballad

$35

Playing Jaco groove on samba

$75

Playing Jaco samba groove on ballad

$150

Attempting last word on final chord

$50

Long gliss down to final note

$200

Forgetting strap

$10

Changing strings between sets

$25

Using electric tuner

$15

Setting up mic "just in case"

$75

Forgetting to turn amp on

$40

Bringing amp larger than you can move yourself

$50

Asking horn player for help moving amp

$25

Bringing custom made bass

$100
per string above 4

Bringing more than one bass

$100
per extra bass

Skull decals on bass

$150

Bringing fretless bass

$500

 


CRIMINAL BAD TASTE
and
BASIC STUPIDITY

Telling bone player about all the gigs you get

$10

Asking bone player about their day gig

$10

Sitting behind drums during break

$25

Practicing scales during drum solo

$50

Practicing

$150

Beginning a sentence, "When I was a guitar player.."

$75

Casually mentioning to musical director of cheap theater that you are "into sequencing..."

$100

Wearing old Buddy Rich tour shirt

$15

Wearing Whitesnake tour shirt

$20

Asking when the rock set starts

$25

Continually asking, "Where are we?"

$40

Continually shouting, "Yeah!"

$25

Asking bone player where "one" is

$250

Taking cell phone call during fours

$100